Saturday, November 29
Blue as a Bronte (but without the cool real estate or talent)
I've been in what Mom and I call a "blue funk" lately. It's not severe, I'm just sort of bummed out lately. It's likely work related. I usually feel this way after the holidays, when it's back to the grind, but I've been on vacation all week and the feeling has sort of lingered over me like an annoying cloud. This whole week has felt like one long Sunday night. Do you know what I mean?
I've got nothing to complain about. I'm blessed with wonderful family and friends. I've pulled myself out of debt, I'm employed, I mostly like my job and I enjoy those I work with. Still, I've just been sort of in the dumps lately.
Contributing to my funk is the fact that I learned, in the first couple of days of my vacation, that I have to go to Bentonville this Monday. I can be spontaneous with my work travel but the thought of being out of the office an additional week makes me hyperventilate. It's not as though the work is going to slow down while I'm away. Lately, it's coming down to having to be brutally cut throat. I have to spend time on the absolute top priorities and pawn off everything/everyone else. It's the only way to get things done. Trouble is, it's not my nature. I tend to try to be helpful but being helpful slows me down. This dilemma has become a bummer. There is also so much work to do that I could literally work 24 hours a day and never catch up. The good news is that each workday flies by however I'm working late hours and that really gets to me after a while. Down time is critical and this vacation was fraught with worries about work. I used to be so good at separating work and me time but I need to be better.
When I get like this I typically reject all things sad or dark and only allow positive influences around me. What are positive influences? Well, they include good friends, happy tv, homey magazines and classic books. Of course it's not easy to completely control everything entering your world but I find the effort is worth it.
Looking back, the blue funk may have started with a random viewing of Jaws followed by Burnt Offerings. It freaked me out. I also happen to be reading, and enjoying, The Witching Hour. I've been drawn to dark things lately, I don't know why, but I think it's time to back off. Seriously, anything with Karen Black in it is officially off limits. I'm not sure why I keep watching things like Interview with a Vampire (It's not only dark, but Tom Cruise is just dreadful! No wonder Anne Rice was so angry about his being cast.) and The Departed. Such downers! It's time to retreat to Jane Austen flicks, The Vicar of Dibley and The Mary Tyler Moore Show. In fact, I should probably just make a pot of tea, wash my face, put on my pjs and get into bed.
Sometimes, just throwing in the towel is best.
Posted by Lucy at 7:06 PM