Tuesday, December 4

You've got to be kidding!

As if I wasn't pissed off enough about the thief at work, I get home tonight and find this BS email in my personal email box. I've highlighted the fun stuff in red:

My Dear,
I want to inform you that the fee for your Cheque Draft has been Paid on Monday morning by 10:30 Pm afternoon because the manager of Eco Bank Benin told me that before the check will get to you it will expire. So itold him to cash the $900, 000.00, all the necessary arrangement of delivering of the $900,000.00 in cash was made with FEDEX COMPANY WORLDWILD.Here is the contact of the fedex Company World Wild bellow.
ATTN: Mr JOHNSON EZE.
EMAIL: fedex_service67@yahoo.dk
Please send them your contacts information to enable them locate youimmediately they arrived in your country with your BOX. This the information they need from in order to delivery your box to your address.
1.YOUR FULL NAME...
2.YOUR HOME ADDRESS ....
3 YOUR CURRENT HOME TELEPHONE NUMBER.....
4.YOUR CURRENT OFFICE TELEPHONE.......
5.A COPY OF YOUR PICTURE.........
Please make sure you send this needed info's to the Director general Fedex Company world wild in Benin Mr JOHNSON EZE. with the address given to you.Note. The fedex company here don't know the contents of the Box.I registered it as a dameges of jeans returning to the retaler. They don't know it contents money to avoid them delaying with the Box. Please don't let them to know that the contents of the Box is money to avoid them from delaying with the box. I am waiting for your urgent response. Meanwhile the only fee you have to pay them is $185 USD they will use to obtain insurance certificate and claims of affadvite that will prove that the box belongs to you. Be rest assure that all other fees have been paid by me.
I am waiting for your urgent response.
Thanks
Willy Joe


The entire email is, of course, ludicrous but do you think anyone is dumb enough to do business with someone name Willy Joe and who calls them "My Dear"?! Blechhhh! It's all so gross!!!!!!! As if I'd reply "Yes, by all means please send your thugs to my home with my box of $900k right away! I've been looking EVERYWHERE for it."

You'd think Willy Joe would invest in a fluent editor to shape up his correspondence. A little editing might go a long way in furthering is life as a scam artist.

And for the record, I can think of few circumstances when calling me "My Dear" wouldn't make me want to poke somebody's eyes out.

On the other hand, do you suppose this could be from a desperate first grader in need of a $185 bike?

1 comment:

Norman said...

Uh, sic throughout, my dear.