Dear Selfish Witch

To the selfish whore who buys up See's Candy Chocolate chips by the case, I hate you. Yeah you!

I dropped by my local See's Candy store to pick up my all-time-favorite chocolate chips and was informed you had bought two case of chips a couple of days ago. That spells "Out of stock" for me. Well, I hope you're happy. You completely took the wind out of my sails. I was going to make chocolate chips cookies for tonight's event but nooooooo. You selfishly bought up every last chip. What kind of maniac buys cases of chocolate chips without special ordering them? What are the rest of us supposed to do? You and I both know the big chips are the best. Those wimpy mini chips you left behind are for sissies. The sales staff claims more chips are on the way and, believe me, I'll be there first. Game on, sister!